Friday, April 30, 2010

To those who are married, .. Not married .. and soon to be married, I hope you will be touched with this story...


When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and
said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly.
Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know
what I was thinking. I want a divorce.. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly,
I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the
chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't
talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what
had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory
answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just
pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated
that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent
ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for
her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I
had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of
me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a
kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several
weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something
at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell
asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.
When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not
care so I turned over and was asleep again.
In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want
anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce.
She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a
life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a
month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken
This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to
recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of
our bedroom to the front door ever morning.. I thought she was going
crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd
I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions.. . She laughed loudly and
thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to
face the divorce, she said scornfully..
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was
explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we
both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy
in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to
the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in
my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about
the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my
chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I
hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time.. I realized she
was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair
was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I
wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy
returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was
growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry
her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me
She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few
dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my
dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so
thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.
Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her
heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out.
To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an
essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer
and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I
might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms,
walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her
hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly;
it was just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held
her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I
held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the
door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked
upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not
want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead.. Do you have
a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I
won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I
didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each
other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on
our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed
the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.
At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my
wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and
wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.
That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I
run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
The small details of your lives are what really matter in a
relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the
bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot
give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend
and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a
real happy marriage!
If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.
If you do, you just might save a marriage.
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they
were to success when they gave up.

Friday, April 16, 2010


masa berjalan…xsangka..dalam masa sebulan atau 2 lg aku akan membawa haluan sendiri..pernah gak aku terfikir benda ni masa skolah..but i never felt tat this moment would eventually be facing seems so real..n i am so scared..scared of making decison tat will shape my future..

smalam cek matriks..kul 12 lebih..mmg nmpak smangat gler ah..awl pgi lg da cek..haha..pastu dptla pinang punye..hepi gak r igt kan ‘apple’ dpt pinang gak-its her first choice of matriks..then dy dpt perak..sabor jela..haha..

sebenarnya fikir dua kali gak masuk matriks ni..byk asasi pun ade gak risiko dy..n i dont quite prefer taking big risks actually..:P..las2 bncang2 n i decided that i wud take foundation if the foundation suits my desire..huu..byk gila keputusan kna buat..

anyway,medic da xbpe nk thinking of engine and architect..both wud be my fav carriers but wat am i to shape my I pray to Allah..may the best carrier will be rewarded to me..hope im blessed even with all the sins ive done to HIM..astaghfirullah..

petang tu sebnarny da dpt foundation kat in electronics and amp..fuhh~..mmg nostalgia abes tmpat tu..

so,im thinking…wat if i take it??wat will happen if i take it??

fikir punya fikir..bleh gakla..sbb last nk anta borang tu pun 28 may..dan aku pun mmg minat,it was not a bad option..but,inspite that..i think i’ll juz let HIM handle beb..n pray that i’ll decide the best..

ckp sal uniten ni..mmg memori byk gler kat sana..wpun hanya dua byk yg berlaku dan dri situ aku menjadi lebih matang ttg hidup..

my first love started there..waa…ni yg sdih sikit aku pegi uniten ni mmg teringat abesla kat my apple..lalu kat dpan ilmu mmg emo abesla aku agknye..huu..she is really is one of a special..

haha…lu igt2 blik..tmpat tu gak antara tmpat pling happy aku pnah g..buat hal ngan geng2 aku..

-yg black-outkan satu block tu xyah ckpla..pastu sling tuduh menuduh lam kelas..haha..mmg hepi..

-yg tiba2 lari xtentu pasal sbb takut kna bunuh ngan budak psiko pun ade..mmg xpasal2 lari..honestly,mmg takut gler r..haha..sume ni sbb si fifi punch budak vi la..

-yg g jln2 g tgok muvi..mcm2 skil ah buat kuar kat pkcik taxi sbb nk suh bg murah..haha..ade gak yg kedekut nk mmpos..

-yg nek lrt..pastu ad awek ni duk kat kitorang..stat r ckp bhsa kod(bhs jepun) gak r..ckp mende pun org len the conversation was so st8 forward..lawak gler r..mmg kitorang je yg bising mlm tu lam lrt..

-yg tgok muvi..bes exp ever had..

  • first double date..xmen duet..tkut terpengaruh ngan godaan-nauzubillah min zalik..jd double date jela aku..bleh saling menasihati..cewah..tgok muvi bosan..*jgn sesekali tgok up in the sial..haha..klu aku ngan aiman je mmg sah2 aku bnuh aiman sbb bli tiket muvi ni..haha..nsib bek apple ad..bleh bual2 sikit..
  • second..sesi prihatin..lawak gler bila aiman rela pecat sweater dy bila tgok apple pakai jaket aku sbb nk bg kat rokiah..haha…

hah??nk lg ke??aku da blank ni..nti aku update len kali..arapla sbb aku bkn slalu update blog ni..haha